Gay Love Lust

It feels amazing to be in a relationship where both parties are pleased in a consensual and mutual way. It could be you and your boo against the world like Bonnie and Clyde; taking the world by storm, having the world on a string. But...there is always a bigger picture. What is the basis of your relationship?

Many times when it comes to the LGBT community we base our standards for a datable person solely on looks. We linger in the shallow waters of the dating pool for the hot bods, but do not notice the cutie in the deep end that could keep us from going under. We wrap our minds around superficial qualities that are nice but could not keep you warm at night. We wanna know: does he have a six pack, is his dick over the average size, can he deepthroat, is his ass fat, is his hole tight, will he let me hit tonight.

All the aforementioned questions and requirements will capture your attention only for a little while and then you will be on to the next big thing. What kind of stability is that? There is no way in hell that that is healthy, and it also says something about you as a person; namely that you are not satisfied with something internally or externally. We do the darnedest things when we try to hide our pain, hurt, guilt, fear, anxiety, sorrow, insecurities, lies, truths, feelings, and callouses.

Consequently, we miss out on so much when we focus on only one aspect. We are left with a lop-sided equation which equals to being lonely and constantly searching for love. We may get our gratification from the physical and sexual need but damn is that it. We are far too complex to feed that one greedy side which is lust, and what a destructive emotion that could be. When lust fills our eyes we submit it falsely to our hearts as love. I'm doing this because I love him, is what we will say but it is translated to this for people with bullshit-proof hearing; The only reason I'm with him is because he's sexy as hell and I want to be greedy. Hell, can I be greedy? Can I get what I want and have my way?

Luckily, the picture becomes more complete and stable when a plethora of time is not spent wasted on looking at the outward appearance. Don't get me wrong. You have to find what you like and what you are attracted to, but make sure they are more than just a pretty face and some abs with a big dick. I guarantee you that nine times out of ten the road to finding this person is going to be a hard and frustrating one; but once you do, you won't have to look again for a long time. That dream person is going to let you know in the beginning what they are all about, and what they will and will not do. They will not lie to you to get you to bed and hell they might even make you wait. This is called Love.

Love is totally different from lust. Although, they both requires a bit of passion their pretty much alien. I like to think that Love is pure and unfailing, and lust is corrupted and destructive; light and dark. Love will add to your life and lust will take away from it; hell it might even take it altogether. Love is that thing that can keep you sane and in your right mind, but lust will make you crazy out of you head and foam at the mouth in search of the real thing; LOVE!

The Church Sissy

The church runs amuck with homosexuality. Its a wonder how many are active partakers in the lifestyle. They are in the pulpit, the choir, usher board and even the general pew population. Homosexuality, the topic, is a strong subject in the church; and whether it is embraced or kept at arms length, it is an obligatory to be dealt with.

On occasion, when folks in the church deal with homosexuality, they tend to hide it from others and sometimes deny it to themselves altogether. This behavior is detrimental to the individual psychologically and physically. It creates an issue with identity, and leaves them susceptible to sexually transmitted diseases.

Moreover, the lifestyle is shunned by the church and rarely talked about; even then all they hear is, "it's wrong, it's wrong, it's wrong", which poses the question, if it's so wrong then why won't anyone help make it right? Think about it, people come before the church when they have other necessities, i.e., financial assistance or other interpersonal problems. But when it comes to homosexuality, the church goes all the way back to slavery by keeping a hushed mouth. If you are, then don't let anyone know and you can slide.

When this activity occurs, it creates room for the dreaded "down low" brother to be created. The down low brother is a male that is bisexual, but identifies himself as straight. He has no problem with sleeping with the same sex, because he is not the protocol, or typical, gay dude. He has proved himself to his counterparts that he's a man. Maybe he has a wife, kids and a great paying job, so when he feels he needs an award he resorts to having sex with other men-most of the times unprotected.

The wife might suspects infidelity, but oftentimes does not think that the other person is a male. She is now at risk for HIV, and other std's by simply obeying the Bible and standing by her man. So when she asks her husband if he's having an affair or not, 9 times out of 10 he will deny, deny, deny-and deny some more; which is a man's number one rule no matter what compromising position he's in.

Evidently, if the church (and the world) were more open to the lifestyle and all it entails, then maybe the said husband would not feel the need to lie when the church taught him to lie-which caused him to lie down the aisle and lie to himself, his family and to God. Maybe if the church said that homosexuality is like hell and it does exist and that it is a problem that needed to be addressed, then maybe people would stop being in denial and identify with having homosexual urges.

More important, the sanctity of marriage will be predicated on honesty instead of a lie. But the church nowadays is based on image. They are worried about the outer appearance when its the inner man that God sees. They (the church) feel that they have to be perfect and hold it together and keep a hushed mouth when it comes to topics that suggest otherwise. There is no God in that...Where is the compassion of God? Who would let a part of the family suffer simply because its not a problem that affects you...When one side of the family suffers it impacts the whole clan. You can ignore and renounce but pretty soon, its going to have to be dealt with.

Peace and Blessing

God is Love,

LongOverdo.

The Proposal

Loneliness can be a complete and utter bitch...Trust me, I know. I have been single for over a year now. That's single and born again celibate since I'm not getting any either.

Desperate times calls for desperate measures, which is exactly why I found myself recently attempting to lower my standard...Maybe I have set them too high, but then again, it is my life and love life at that. I can afford to be picky, right?

But that knee-jerk, or maybe pre-meditated, action set into motion a topic that I would like to discuss.

Would you rather be lonely or with a person that you know does not love you?

As stated earlier, being lonely is hard. You look and see your friends enjoying the company of their someone special, and you only have a chilly bed and frumpy pillow that will never suffice. You begin to feel like Rachelle Ferrell when she states in "Nothing in the Middle", strangers on my telephone and crickets in my bed. You want, need and yearn that somebody to call your own; someone to occupy space in this world with you when the vast empty darkness of your bedroom envelopes around you.

Conversely, having someone to share your life with will help lighten your load. You can call them at two o'clock in the morning and know that they will pick up on the third ring, and even though they will have to be at work at eight, you know that for them to hear your voice and you theirs is a blessing. Don't get me wrong, couples have their ups and downs...hell even 'round and 'round at times. Being out of your mind is better when there is two, right?

Wrong...when you are in a relationship with someone that does not reciprocate the same amount of love as you, what would be the point of you wasting your time? Sometimes being in a relationship is lonelier than being alone (Let that ass marinate on that). If they're not the one for you, then what are you to them but their advantageous conquest or whatever means they are seeking to finagle from you.

Most of the time in those situations, the person is trying to take what they can before they hit the road. But when you are alone, you can truly see you for you. You begin to recognize what you like and dislike. By doing this, you add to yourself by improving what you feel is necessary. Hey, you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else, and that might be cliche' but my dear it is an age old fact. That ole' cold bed and limp pillow don't seem so bad after all.

Peace and Blessings

God is Love

Up-and-Coming Author Dapharoah69

I am completely elated and enthralled. While perusing youtube for videos about the late great E. Lynn Harris, I came across this refreshing new author by the name of Dapharoah69, whose real name is Larry Wilson, Jr; but he is the self-proclaimed "King of Erotica".

He has a slew of books on Barnes and Nobles and Amazon. His latest is sure to be a captivating tale which is entitled, "Call Her Queen Hatshepsut"; which I might add that I cannot wait to read.

Check out his youtube page here.

And also a interview from gbmnews.com

The Disappearance of Black Love

I could talk about Black Love ad nauseam. Just the thought fills me with a warm feeling. I love to see two consenting adults together and in it to win it; and you bets believe against all odds.

See, I had always heard while growing up that famous Blacks always married outside of the race, being that their mentality becomes different from their peers. Many engagements that they would attend had far too few Blacks and created a void only to be filled by White, Hispanic, Indian or what have you.

Now, by no means am I a racist, but I can identify with Jill Scott when she told Essence magazine in the April 2010 edition, "I felt my spirit...wince", while referring to Black men dating outside of the race. There is a sudden pinch to your soul when you see a good Black man proclaim his love for a person of another race.

Scott goes on to say, "Black women and Black men struggled together". Black people as a race have triumphantly overcome slavery, racism and prejudices. So, when a Black woman, or man, sees a Black man with another race, it equates to a slap in the face; a mighty blow from turning on your own kind when others tried to rape, torture and destroy us.

Nevertheless, if fame was not enough of a reason to date outside of the race, hate is...Black women always have attitudes. Black men don't wanna raise their kids. You're too dark. You're hair is too coarse. These are simple concepts that get leaked down to the next generation by way of the present. We do not understand that we are destroying our race with these derogatory comments. What are the children suppose to think?

They do what we tell them. They have children by Whites just so their child can have more European features. They permanently relax their hair because we have taught them that it is not okay to wear it natural. Pretty soon, they forget who they are. They forget that their ancestors come from Africa. They forget that the skin that they are in is beautiful and bronze and golden just like the gods and kings and queens of Kemet, or Ancient Egypt. They forget that we were taken from our land and brought here as slaves.

It is up to us to rectify our own undoing...

Alas, if love is true and love is sufficient, then it can be found with any race or any gender. But love should never be forced. Love should never be a product of your posh environment because love, true love, is more grandiose than any of us on this planet. God is Love, and if He is love then we simply must wait until He manifests it into our lives.

Peace and Blessings

God is Love

The Ricky Ricardo Illusion

One of my all time favorite shows happens to be I Love Lucy. Aside from the frivolous attempts of the main character, one aspect always caught my attention. No matter what Lucy got into, her man was always close by to offer love, support, and oftentimes knowledge.

That man was of course, Ricky Ricardo; a Cuban nightclub singer with a sunny disposition. He was optimistic and usually wore his feelings right on his suit coat. He showed his love and compassion to Lucy whether she was right or wrong; which she was 9 time out of 10 the latter.

The onscreen romance was blissful and heaven sent. Ricky and Lucy were the ideal couple. They completed each other, and he was her ying and she his yang; a perfect and equal union.

So I sat and wondered..."Damn, does this really happen? Is there someone out there to complete little ole me?" Clearly the drama and theatrics were hyperboles, but the main structure of the show had to have been derived from a real life situation. Evidently hundreds of thousands of us were doing something right.

But let me leave tinseltown for a minute...

Ricky Ricardo was Desi Arnaz and Desi, as we all know, was married to Lucy or, Lucille Ball. Their real life marriage was not all quirky mishaps and make-ups, but had ended in divorce due to Desi's drug and womanizing problems.

The question I want to know is; do we conceptualize what we want love to be based on any form of the media?

Are you in search of a Ricky Ricardo or are you prepared to handle a Desi Arnaz?

Add me on twitter...

To B Black, Gay, and....FAT

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This Movie...I Just Can't Wait

Apparently, I am late on books and modern authors but there is one that I am yearning to get my hands on. It is called "Push" by Sapphire. The book is a tale of a young female by the name of Claireece Precious Jones. Now, obviously I can not tell you what the book is about being that I have not read it, or hell heard of it until recently. But "Push" was made into a movie by director Lee Daniels and entered into the Sundance Film Festival 2009. The movie was seen by Tyler Perry, who pitched it to Oprah; and both present the movie "Precious".

"Precious" will be in theaters November 6, 2009.
***Notable celebs included: Mariah Carey, Monique, Lenny Kravitz, Sherri Sheperd, and Paula Patton

THE OFFICIAL TRAILER








{Description from Yahoo Movies}

Clareece "Precious" Jones is an overweight, illiterate African-American teen in Harlem. Just as she's about to give birth to her second child, Jones is accepted into an alternative school where a teacher helps her find a new path in her life.





Here is the audition tape from newcomer Gabourey Sidibe who stars as Precious....



This girl has talent....ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!

A Blockbuster...Indeed

The tyrant Tyler Perry is at it again with his newly converted stage play-to-movie entitled, " I Can Do Bad All By Myself". I am enthralled at how progressive he is and am appreciative of his work. " I Can Do Bad All By Myself" hits theaters September 11, 2009. Oh, last but not least, Mary J. Blige is rumored to be a part of the new film.

Lala Vasquez Shows She's Still Hood...Girl!!!!!!

The fiancee of Carmelo Anthony gets hood at recent game (May 12). I knew she still had that hood in her.





SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO GO THERE!!

Ne-Yo Exposed and He's Straight...Or at least Bi

Wonder who's pics are going to surface next?


*Click pic to enlarge*


Courtesy of Concrete Loop

This Dude Here...The Business

www.youtube.com/xemvanadams

I'm sure y'all know...

New Dude Pt. 2

Like I said before, M and I go way back and he was the first person that I would consult in this situation. I was attracted to new dude but that was the initial stage...hell, I don't even know if he is gay or not; but the vibe that I was receiving from him were so strong.

"What do you think I should do?" I said.
"What do you mean?" M replied.
"About new dude..."
"I say just go for it...I mean its not like he knows you or anybody that you know, he's from out of town remember."
"Yea, you're right."

By this time new dude was no longer working beside me and had found a new work area. The only chance to see him was on lunch break. Yea, that's perfect...he'd be alone and we could talk in private.

So, I anxiously awaited lunch; which could not get there fast enough, but when it did I know it would soon fly by. I had to move quickly in hopes of connecting. I was stoked, because it had been a minute since me and new dude actually talked.

When lunch came, I rushed to find him. I was out of luck...Damn.

I proceeded to head to the bathroom because all that water I was drinking to stay awake had shown its wrath. Nonetheless, I was mindful not to take too much time knowing that my break was limited and I had a goal to accomplish. When lo and behold, as I went to wash my hands, new dude came to do the same. ( It was kinda like one of those moments in the movies when everything gets quiet and Etta James' "At Last" begins to play...corny, I know. LOL!) "This has to be a sign," I thought. A feeling of sexual desire flushed my body as he walked closer. He noticed me and gave one of those gorgeously magnificent smiles that he had...Homeboy was the business.

I said, "hello" and he reciprocated, then I split. I did not feel comfortable making a connection in the bathroom. When I made my exit I thought, "Hold on, I spent all this time thinking about this dude...Naw, us gon' talk today." ( Had to get ghetto) So, I waited...Hell, I figured he was just washing his hands it should not take that long.

I made a brief conversation with him when he walked out.

"Hey, what's up?" I said.
" Nuthing." He said
"You kick it in blah blah blah, right?"
"Yea"
"What's your number? Me and my crew will be in that area this weekend."

I was pressed for time and on the spot and that was the best I could muster. He gave me his digits and I was on my way to find M. He was chilling in the cafeteria.

"Ask about me" I said to M.

I'm so.....Over It

You ever get to the point where you are at your wits end? I mean you put in all this work, time , and effort into a certain thing and have nothing to show for it...I am truly over it. I am a strong person but it is gettin to the point where drastic measure need to be made and quite frankly I am all out of ideas...

Ugh!!! Why am I having a pity party? That is so not my steelo...I need to get it together!!!!! I need to blow my nose, run a cold towel over my face, and keep it moving. *sigh*

I'm so done with the bullshit...OVER!

I just got to remember that my life has nothing to do with me but God's fulfillment...I'm just living it.

Laugh Out Loud Monday

You Got to Love Jessica Savitch...One Word ---Diva

My New Boo...Da Bizness

Guess who I just got done talking to????

That's my baby right there

New Dude Pt.1

It's ten o'clock and I am just getting into work. Hmm..."How can I make this day go faster?", I thought. I turned to my co-worker to initiate a random conversation. But as I turned my head I see a light-skinned brother who was virile and stunning at the same time. He embodied everything that I wanted in a man.
I watched him from the entrance and was surprised when he was placed to work beside me. "Tongue, bitch, be still" I thought to myself. How was I suppose to work now. He was modest (major turn on) and had the cutest smile with the biggest lips ( in a sexy way).
He delved into the assignment giving me a genuine, kind smile every once in a while but never said a word.
So I asked him, "You're from out of town aren't you?"
He replied, "Yes, how do you know?"
"I can tell" I responded.

Every response was precise and he did not seem to be in a talking mood. " So much for conversational pieces," I wandered. I looked to my co-worker, whose name is M, and proceeded to inform him of the new dude.
"You like him don't you" said M.
" Ooh, I can't stand you...You know too much!" I said.
"Boy, you know I know you!" He said.

M and I go way back and were hired at this job at the same time. He knows that I am "gay" ( I am going to say that, but it is a word that somebody else made up) and I know that he is DL. He knows when I am feeling someone and vice versa. Being around M made the time fly by but gazing into the new dudes eyes stopped time for a split second, which was enough time for me to catch my breath.

Lord, help me make it through the night...

Laugh Out Loud Monday...Err, Uhh Tuesday

I don't know if you have seen this but either way it is a classic and its funny

Laugh Out Loud Monday

I thought this was so funny!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL!!!

Ugh...Times Like These

Have you heard of the cliche "The career is on fire but the bed is ice cold"? (sumthing like that)

I always felt like I would have a banging career and my love life would be lackluster as a consequence. I am very rigid in my thinking when it comes to my career.

• I know what I want
• I go after what I want
• I am very determined in achieving my goals
• I refuse to let anybody stand in my way

• Put God First (of course) {Total OxyMoron}
  

Every relationship that I have had in the past year or so has ended in the same manner. I would be so occupied that my mate at the time drifts slowly into the mind frame of rethinking the whole relationship.

I know. I know. I have to do better! But I refuse to sit on my dreams and see them whither away and I also expect my partner to be proactive. I want to find encouragement in my partner. I want to know that we are in this together. Its 2009, the time is now! Also, just because we have a relationship does not mean we are having sex...(Puhlease, a finger and a hand will do just fine...Lol, did I just say that?)

Naw, but real talk...
Do I set my standards to high? Am I looking for a guy that does not exist?